Vacation of insanity!

Well I was supposed to be going to san antonio w/ the girls this weekend to tube the river and instead i sprained my ankle. So i decided to go to dallas. Well when i could walk on it i decided i'd go at least to be w/ the girls and hang out. Then my roommate's van (that we were going to take to SA) died and we were unable to take the trip anyway. So then my other roommate and a friend decided they were going to go to ruston LA this weekend. I couldn't decide between ruston and dallas. I finally decided upon dallas so that I could see my grandma whom i love spending time with, go to waxahachie and look at apartments, and meet up w/ my mom and brother and get my dog! I took my family to go see Waxahachie and the SAGU campus. We looked at some apartments. I still haven't decided how I want to work that out. Either moving to Waxahachie in january living in an apartment or getting dad to get a house, moving to Euless and staying with grandma for a semester, or possibly living with some other friends in the metroplex. Anywho- I was going to leave monday mornign but changed my mind sunday afternoon because of a take home test i had due on monday and i went ahead and left. i had some friends that were driving back to lubbock and they were a couple of hours behind me. I got about 2 hours away from lubbock and i got pulled over by a cop. I had my cruise set to 4 over so i wasn't really sure what i was getting pulled over. Come to find out he pulled me over for driving in the left lane because the left lane was for passing only. I had to keep from laughing when he told me, but missy made that easy since she was in the back seat barking like crazy at this man that she would have ripped into shreds had i let her. Well, i'm also a girl so there's several things on my car i dont' really take care of. For instance, not only was i driving in the left lane, but i didn't have an up to date insurance card, and my car's inspection was out. But by playing the innocent girl he came back and he's like ok i'm giving you a warning... for driving in the left lane, speeding (74 in a 70), no proof of insurance, and out of date inspection. I was like, thank you so much. about 2 min. later my friends call and they had gotten in a wreck in weatherford, about 3 hours back towards dallas!! I turned back around to go get them. I literally drove friday from lbk to euless- sat. euless to waxahachie to dallas to euless- sunday euless to roscoe (past abilene) back to weatherford back to abilene- monday abilene to lbk..... Oh the joys of college. Luckily my professor is really chill and he told me to not even come to class and to come turn in my paper tomorrow. So the girls are having a veg out day.
I've really been frustrated the past few days and i'm trying to overcome that. I like order. Nothing has been in order and that causes some frustration for me. I have to admit my control issues, i like to control situations and not being able to control things is what has really driven me insane. I also like to know my next step and i feel at a stand still. I know that I am graduating in December. I know that i'm going to start Sagu in january. But i don't know if i want to do school full time or part time. work full time or part time. live in waxahachie, euless, or the metrolplex... for how long.. with who... etc. I realize i feel like i'm 17 again. I'm trying to decide where i want to go, what i want to do, who i want to be. . . etc. and once again i'm having to learn to humble myself, be patient, and let God be God. I should be lucky that i even have a clue as to what i'm doing in january. I don't know i'm struggling to be grateful and i'm settling more in the confused and frustrated, never a good sign. I do look forward to the things God is doing at Encounter here in LBK and I need to stay focused on what God has before me right now. Help me in praying for focus and wisdom. God's good and I know good things are coming.
J. Tate